From The Desk of Darlene J. Harris – “And He Restoreth My Soul” – The Impact of Loveless Relationships by Pat Allison, State Licensed Health Professional

Greetings everyone!

As I read through “And He Restoreth My Soul” I am always amazed at the information that jumps out at me as if I’ve never read it before. But, isn’t this the way with books that we keep close. The bible shines a light in and on itself over, and over again. I love it!

Pat Allison is one of the contributors to “And He Restoreth My Soul”. This is a small part of the article she shared, and as I read it today it jumped off the page at me. Then I thought, maybe our readers might be influenced by this as much as me.

May you always be kept in the power of the GREAT I AM!

Darlene J. Harris, Servant


The Problem

Alcohol, drugs, sex, money, and relationships are all commonly abused in the lives of the personally violated. PRIDE acts as a protective shield while hiding behind SHAME. ANGER acts as a defense against fear of the TRUTH. Survivors build walls around their pain of incest, rape, rejection, or ridicule. They seek peace and serenity and yet are easily drawn into false teachings—methods of repair and healing that promise to help them “look good” and “feel good,” providing them only a temporary improvement and a lot of “feel worse” time afterward. Some survivors learn about God as a Higher Power, but rarely study His full character. They create an imagined identity of who God is, and follow an uncertain path according to what they understand, that is drawn from their flawed past experiences. Their faith is weakened because of so many broken promises and threats to their well being. They are continually led into a pit of darkness, leaving them in pain, confusion, and living a loveless existence. They pretend to be functional while suppressing the truth, in order to feel acceptable or to “fit in” with society.

Our Task

We need to build bridges across the generations of abuse: to learn to communicate at a truthful, deep, and intimate level to those who have been abused; to learn from one another and to help one another, in love. Our objective is to lead survivors from an experience that shattered their lives to wholeness and healing.

The present writer is grateful for the gift of compassion and a life filled with loving relationships. She is privileged that her heart has been opened to mercy for those who are lost and suffering. She has been a friend, a listener, and an encourager to many abused people. She has realized that they need a safe place to communicate their misery and overcome their fears. They need a ministry to follow that will help them to reveal the truth of their suffering—a place to learn forgiveness…a place where they can be shepherded and equipped to walk in a path with a fixed gaze on the love of our almighty God and to live in His light.